Manifest the Ultimate

Epic Journey Imminent!

2011-05-14T23:37:00.000-07:00

Duders!

my epic trip to south/central america is imminent!!!

In a few hours I will be on a plane to do the folk music teaching project I did last summer in Russia. Only this time I'm going to Colombia, Ecuador, and Peru!

I'm going along with the same people and you can monitor our progress at eslfolk.com

That portion of my trip will be over in June. After that I am going to Xela, guatemala to go to language school for a month, then hopefully going to this project called Long Way Home in San Juan Comalapa, guatemala, working on building homes and schools with natural materials. After that, I have vague plans to visit our friend in Guadalajara, and who knows what else afterwards...

Anyhoo, I'll send emails out periodically and post here periodically. If you wanna know whats good keep your eyez peeeeeeeeled.

I love you all!

-jordan

Airport and Benzodryl...

2010-05-25T11:56:00.000-07:00

Free internet at домодедово!

Today was
sf to
nyc to
helsinki to
stokholm to
moscow to
crazy metro ride to
boarding my plane to tomsk !

shit!!

i'm seeing and hearing htingsthinginsinghitingisnthigishtinsgisn...

Going to Russia heckuv soon!

2010-05-16T04:11:00.001-07:00

Yo internet dwellers!

Its been hella days since I even looked at this old thing, but now that I'm cruising out to Russia in 10 days for a 6 week music tour I figured I would re-ignite the passion.

Essentially, I'm meeting up with my good friend Matt who has been teaching English and eating squid chips in Russia for the last two years, and writing about these things here.

Part of his English teaching curriculum has included playing old time music for English learners, and he got a grant to tour around this summer doing that. He invited me to come, and of course I was capital X stoked!

My journey begins with a 40 hour travel journey through several airports to Tomsk, a Russian city south of Moscow. From there we our itinerary is as follows

Elista June 5-8
Rostov June 9-11
Rest June 12-15
American Center June 16
Gubkin June 17-20
Ufa June 21-24
Samara June 25-28

Should be awesome! Anyhoo, if ya'll wanna know whats really with me in Russia, this is the jamb spot.

-j

Biking with 13 year olds

2009-08-25T23:59:00.000-07:00

On Saturday I took the most bitchin' bike ride to the Marin Headlands with four young-uns from the Bike Kitchen youth program. The youth were hella stoked and had never biked over the bridge before. We rode up the hill to the left of the bridge and then down this dirt trail into Rodeo Valley, and then back to the Bike Kitchen.

The whole time I was really feeling how pumped up these youth were, and how rad it was that me and my Bike Kitchen cohorts were doing this trip all volunteer status. It was so quasi-official: We had rules, permission slips, sunscreen, first aid; at the same time, we had no bullshit program stuff to deal with, and the kids both looked up to us as teacher types as well as friends. Totally posi saturday--in the words of Good Clean Fun: "Everyone had fun and no one got hurt!"

Who knows if these young people will even remember this ride, or what the fuck they will get into as they grow up. At least for now it feels good to be providing a positive space for some young people to hang out and create adventures for themselves.

I wonder what other kinds of cutty shit we can do with these kids?

Die Party ist sehr bØring!

2009-08-08T01:11:00.000-07:00

The adventure was halted in its tracks today at an undeniably wac party, and I've realized that I haven't been to any really awesome house parties lately.

Whats the deal with that? People hella not trying to meet each other, people hella into being hella rude to each other, and girls hella trying to treat me like I'm some cabron-ass douchebag trying to pick up on them (stop flattering yourself) when all I'm trying to do is find out where the rest of the Fig Newmans are at (pretty please?).

What an inane social life. Boring! If anyone found the fig Newmans, lemme know.

The Epic Journey Continues!

2009-07-26T22:44:00.000-07:00

Cyberspace! Due to the demands of Mommy Pangburn, DBDeezo, and my own need to document my encounters, I am writing this blog again!

What the fuck has been going on, XjXbxtrXsmkX?

Excellent question, dear reader. In all truth, not a ton. I am thankfully not working at the Cafe Lame-O, having moved on to being a mental health and drug treatment counselor at a residential treatment center. A much longer title than 'half-assed barista.'

I work two days a week, and the job is intense/challenging/mind expanding in many ways. It is really relieving to feel like I'm actually contributing something, and now that I've been there for 3 months I'm starting to get the hang of it and have a handle on it. My coworkers are rad, and although the job is stressful at times I'm really enjoying it and having a good time there. Plus I'm known as J-Bax to the clients, my fellow counselors, and my boss.

Two days a week is a rad schedule but in between work days I'm not up to too much, plus I've been living with the folks, and the result is that I've been spending a lot of time alone.

What are you doing with your time, J-Bax?

Not fucking much! What the fuck? For the first time ever I have a bunch of time, and no idea what the fuck to do. Sheesh. I always have felt like I've wanted a challenge and I've wanted to push myself, and being completely without a schedule or structural obligations has proven to be the most unlikely and difficult challenge yet.

In truth, I've been pretty depressed. My motivation has ran away like my neighbors cat when they neutered it, and at times activities that are normally ultra rad-sauce for me (working at the bike kitchen, playing music, docking) are empty, meaningless, devoid of fun. I have been feeling very blank, silent, and lost.

There is some hope, however. I've been sharing this with all my friends and am now setting up a weekly discussion group to talk about mental health stuff with my friends. I'm also gonna start seeing a therapist regularly, and I've been trying out all sorts of meditation and other mindfulness practices to keep my brain pumped up.

I've also realized recently that I love being lost in the physical sense--taking a new route home, finding myself in a new city and having to discover new things and explore--and I'm trying to apply this attitude to my life. The grand adventure, the ultimate journey!

And the next adventure is...?
Now that I've been applying this attitude to my general existence, I'm gonna try to use this blog to document the adventures that I undertake, to serve as a kind of journal to help me figure out where I am, how I got here, and where I want to go.

Right now I feel like I'm surrounded by a thick fog, on a little boat at sea. I can't see shit and my compass fell in the water. The water isn't to choppy, but as far as I can tell I'm just floating around with no clue about whats happening. At times I'll dock (literally and figuratively...whoa!) and see some coastal city, at times some seagulls may pass overhead, and sometimes I jump in for a dip.

We'll see where this little tugboat put puts off to next. Until then, peace out!

-Dr. Bax

Week 1 in the Yay

2008-11-25T10:26:00.000-08:00

Damn, I have had a bitchin' week here in the yay area!

I already have a job, at this goofy little coffee shop on 26th and Geary called Cafe Euro. Read awesome reviews here. Also, the cafe has some pretty sweet regular customers. Peter is this really old dude who never says anything but comes in and goes through five or Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Peppers! (Totes too many flavs in that Dr. P, Bro!) He'll drink one, doze off for half and hour, wake up, and get another. He just hands you a dollar and brings you the can to open for him. There's also this dude who comes in about every 3 hours and order a quadruple espresso or something equally ridiculous, gulps it down, and tosses the cup behind him and walks out. All in all, it keeps it interesting.

I went to a rad potluck at the infamous Bus Stop House, a co-op where a bunch of my buddies live. Upon arriving, I was stoked to hear about a sweet upcoming party: crashing 24 hour fitness at 2 am! Apparently we can get 7 day trial passes for free, which means if we coordinate a fat crew of us can roll in and hit the hot tub, drink champagne, and give each other dumpstered food facials. We're gonna have a fashion show for best work out clothes, with the runway being the treadmill of course. As Mereb put it, its an adult playground.

I've been spreading the idea of a Richmond Vs. Sunset Capture the Flag around, and people are stoked. I'm really excited for the Richmond neighborhood team. Once the Sunset gets of their lazy asses, we can have an epic 4 day capture battle in Golden Gate Park!

I sang Livin La Vida Loca at Karaoke. It was almost as cool as this.

Oh, I almost forgot, Bill O' Reilly put together a really good clip of what San Francisco is really like. I'm so glad I can finally share with all of you who haven't visited what the scene is like in SF.

All in all, I'm super happy and super stoked to be in SF. This rocks!

Much love,
jordan

The trip is over!

2008-11-18T19:55:00.000-08:00

Well, I just got back in to San Francisco, officially marking the end of my epic, ultimate, dymaxic journey. What a ballin' adventure!

I will continue to fill cyberspace with descriptions of my deviant behavior in SF, so if you liked it so far hold on to your pants!

Here is a pretty brutalepic picture of me, Kevin, and Guard Dog meeting Joe Biden. Hearts, j bxtr smk

Back in Portland

2008-11-10T23:44:00.000-08:00

Well, I haven't updated ya'll in a little while, and I totally wanted to but I just had no time and no energy before the election was over. I have returned triumphantly to Portlandistan I find myself with some respite, and I'd love to fill ya'll in on my jamb.

Here are a few vignettes to fill you in on where I've been at:

Aristocrat Ranchette: Your dream place!

Aristocrat Ranchette was a development that Kevin and I canvassed in the middle of Northeast Colorado. It is all dirt roads with many run down trailers/homes. The definition of trailer trash. I knocked on one door, only to look at the awning and see it filled with wasp nests! Yikes!

Aristocrat Ranchette, also known as Aristoshits, was filled with many animals. HELLA dogs, including a few huskies that would fight randomly/follow me and Kevin around in the streets, all sketchy like. We got chased out of more than a few yards. This, however, was just the beginning of the wild petting adventure that was ready to ensue. On the long walks between houses we were greeted with chickens, horses, cows, a few geese, and peacocks! Maybe this is what happened to Animal Farm after George Orwell stopped writing about it.

Finally, the wierdest thing about this place is that a good 80% of the neighborhood was Obama supporters! So, I guess that makes these people fake americans too.

Meeting Joe Biden

Joe Biden was speaking in Colorado, and Kevin and I got sent to help schlep his luggage when his plane landed. When we showed up, however, I realized that this was an airport, where it is someone's job to schlep luggage. Thus, there was nothing left for me and Kevin to do but be the guys who shook Joe Biden's hand as he got off the plane. Joe is a real close talker, a real charmer, and he spoke with me, Kevin, and Guard Dog for about 10 minutes, no joke! Pretty much awesometown, if you ask me.

GOTV

GOTV means Get Out To Vote, and it is used to describe the last 96 hours of an election. Basically, we bust our ass doubletime during this period because after the 4th it was over. To my disbelief, this meant that we would work harder. 16 hour days became 20 hour days, 20 hour days became 22 hour days, 22 hour days turn into literal all nighters. In the last 4 days Kevin and I collectively had 15 hours of sleep.

Basically, during GOTV we just pump up our voter outreach and make sure we reach everyone. Kevin and I were put in charge of a town called Fort Lupton, and our job was to make sure every person on our list for the area was talked to by a representative of the campaign at least once before the 4th. This list, of roughly 1,000 people, was collected from months of research: by the last four days we knew exactly who had voted early and who hadn't, who was supporting Obama, and who was likely to support Obama. With this info we built incredibly specific lists of voters, and sent our volunteers out to get in touch with them.

Election day itself was the above work ethic multiplied by a billion. The plan was to go through each neighborhood at least twice if not three times. The tightest part was that we were getting updated data from the secretary of state every few hours about who had and hadn't voted. This meant that as the day wore on, our list got smaller. The idea is to be so specific that when people come home from work, there is an Obama volunteer sitting on their stoop ready to literally drag them to the polls.

Come 4 or 5, the rule is that everyone needs to split the office and hit the doors to make sure every last person goes out and votes. Needless to say, Kevin and I were exhausted to the point of delirium at this stage. However, this was also the last chance we had to change the election--if it was a close race, those last minute votes could count ( look at how close the Al Franken race is in Minnesota right now. )

So, dead tired, I grabbed a neighborhood with about 40 doors in it and started sprinting, literally sprinting, from door to door. "Is such and such home? Have you voted?" "Sorry ma'am, your son might not have voted, the secretary of state says here that they haven't." "You need to go the polls? Lets roll!"

I don't know where the energy came from, but it was a huge release, the total end of the campaign. I ran from house to house for 3 hours straight until 7 PM when polls closed, and I was all but keeled over when Kevin picked me up and we headed back to the main office.

The Big Bang

Kevin and I started hearing results the second we were done on Election day. Pennyslvania, then Ohio. We were giddy, excited, but we hadn't clinched it yet. I figured it would be many hours before we figured out what happened. Suddenly however, someone in the office said, very calmly

"Barack Obama's the president."

Silence. All heads turned, and saw a CNN website that pointed out how Obama had clinched the race as soon as the west coast polls closed. For a split second that lasted an eternity, we all stopped. For me the whole month of campaigning passed between synapses firing in my brain. For others it was two whole years in that space between recognizing and acknowledging and believing the ultimate.

And then it hit us. I can't put it into words; I can only say that I sprinted 10 blocks to the bar where the party was, covered my entire torso, face and glasses with Obama stickers, (pictures coming ASAP) and couldn't stop screaming "Barack Hussein Obama motherfuckers!" for about 4 days straight.

Cloud Ten

There is a cloud ten, and I now inhabit said place. Ever since the moment that I realized Obama was the prez, my whole world was flipped over. I am now in the souther hemisphere, ya dig? Everything is possible, and I've ( as well as all us other young fools) have many decades to create even more ultimate realities now.

I'm going back to San Francisco on the 18th, where I will get an awesome 4 day a week job and spend the rest of my time playing hella music and living in a balling co-op house.

Join the fucking party

-j bxtr smk

Surfaced!

2008-10-15T22:38:00.001-07:00

Phew! holy shit I have been hella busy in Colorado the last week. The deputy field organizer job is cool, because we are just getting paid for what we did already. basically we get up, knock on hella doors, make phone calls until 9 pm, enter pages of data from the door knocks and the phone calls into the computer, make maps for the next days door knocking, and go to bed. I kinda dig this busy lifestyle, and the people on the campaign are pretty fun to hang with. Some canvassing highlights from my and Kevin's exploits include:

*Bite/Hump combo attack on my leg from the tiniest terrier I've ever seen,
*Meeting an 88 year old woman who called Sarah Palin a "slut,"
*Being told that Barack Obama fits the description of the antichrist in the book of revelations,
*being informed that everything Barack Obama says is "straight out of the Communist Manifesto,"
*meeting a woman who won't vote for Obama until he makes public his birth certificate and health records, and,
*"How does Barack Obama feel about getting pets spayed and neutered?"

I also got to speak on a radio show at the University of Northern Colorado with a very DJ who stated: "Hey man, do blaze? Cause I blaze and I'm totally down to blaze with you...I've got a digital vaporizer and I'd totally smoke you out." The show was relaly fun but was only broadcast in the dorms at UNC, which is probably a good ting: after I finished takling about Obama's economic policy, and trying to sound hella profesh, he commented:

"yo dog, this shit is mad crazy. So you heard my man Jordan: vote! get off your ass and prosper. Word."

He told me to "unwind" with him after the campaign, and hopefully that will mean celebrating on November 5th. I find myself having a lot invested in this campaign as I go door to door and talk to all these people in Colorado who are genuinely undecided about who they're going to vote for. One of my field organizers found it ridiculous that the fate of the free world may be literally decided by these people who aren't sure if Obama is a Muslim or not, but for me its just a continual huge wake-up call. Look at how everyone else lives! Portland and San Francisco are such bubbles, we are so fucking different from places like Greeley. What a great gift our prosperity has delivered us.

Anyhoo, I'm gonna try and catch some shut eye, I wish I could disseminate my thoughts in a more detailed way but there isn't enough time or energy to sound like anything but a stuck up, west coast, tax and spend and take guns away from people liberal.

from the lions mouth,
-j baxter smoke

going underground.

2008-10-11T01:22:00.000-07:00

duders, sorry this hasn't been too exciting of late, but i've been working crazy hours on this campaign. its much more nuts than i originally thought but i really dig it.

i just got hired as a deputy field organizer which essentially means i will be working more--i am now required by my job to knock on at least 100 doors (that was called a low estimate by my trainer) and call hella volunteers every day 7 days a week.

i am now entering the mystic realm of 20 hour days until the election. there is something like 540 hours until november 4th. i am going underground and will be incommunicado, excepting urgent housing situations and such.

please vote and you can call battleground states from your house on barackobama.com. we will win or lose by a few thousand votes.

what a trip.

love
j baxter smoke

Lets not fuck ourselves over again

2008-10-09T08:18:00.000-07:00

Sketchy business in voter registration land, as usual.

Also, see the Obama thizz face.

On the campaign trail...and the NY times!

2008-10-05T22:42:00.000-07:00

Check out a video on the NY Times website about where I'm at in Colorado.

Also peep realclearpolitics.com to see updated polls and electoral maps and see why Bumfuck Colorado is the actually very important to the future of this fucking country.

In other news, I have no time to post anything because we're pulling 14 hour days 7 days a week.

love,
-jordan

Hear about the Harlem Children's Zone!

2008-09-30T09:08:00.000-07:00

Geoffrey Canada, the most supreme boss ever and founder of the Harlem Children's Zone, was on NPR the other day. Let the knowledge drop on you:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=94977387

I've also posted below about my most recent travel experiences.

-j

Minneapolisis isis

2008-09-28T09:23:00.000-07:00

The last few days I have been relaxing in Minneapolis and reflecting in New York. I've been thinking a lot about the people who hosted me, and so I wanted to give them a shout out on the global interplex:

First, Thanks to Pops for showing me the high life in Manhattan and getting us the ballingest hotel I've ever seen. And thanks to Mom for letting him out of the house!

Molly, Corin, Ryan, Peter, Nif, Damian, Ned, and Malcolm: you all rock for giving me unfettered access to your ballin-ass pads and showing me around NYC. You all are welcome on my couch/in my bed any time.

Being in Minneapolis for the past few days has certainly helped me re-imagine my time in New York. By my last week I felt fully integrated into the city, one tiny piece of that giant machine. I felt comfortable with the New York attitude. Everyones' trying to get from point A to point B, and nothing stands in there way. And while this gnar-agro attitude is present when you pass people on the street, when I talked one on one with someone I didn't know they were for the most part nice and helpful. I didn't find New York to be as alienating as people told me it would be.

Staying in apartments, instead of hostels, was most excellent because I had quiet personal space when I needed it. As a result, I got a glimpse into what actually living in NYC would be like, and I didn't get burnt out so quick. It also allowed me to step outside of the madness and catch my breath.

I would say my four weeks was the perfect travel time--by the end I felt I had to either move in or leave. More than four weeks in any one place without an agenda is a little much for me.

New York was also a bit of a reprieve from the depression I've been dealing with and experiencing heavily in Portland. Of course, there were times on this trip where I was down, bored, tired, and soaking wet from unprecedented rain. But overall I felt more activated, present, and energized in New York than I have in Portland. I also noticed that while in New York I started to self identify as a unique, smart, creative individual. This wouldn't seem like a big deal if it didn't contrast so sharply with the way I was seeing myself in Portland. Being in and having to deal with New York was a catalyst for my own energy and ambitions.

The best part of my time in New York is how I've carried this stoked-ness with me into Minneapolis. Evenjust chillaxing in Minneapolis I have still felt content, motivated, inspired, and happy with myself. Basically NYC felt like a big wake up call.

Me and Kevin will depart to Colorado tomorrow and begin campaigning on Thursday. Previous campaigners have advice? Also, if anyone knows where we might backpack for a few days while we're down there, please share your brainchild with us.

word!
-j

pictures from the freedom tunnels

2008-09-24T18:13:00.000-07:00

Today I went with some buddies to these Amtrak tunnels that start on 116th and Riverside park and go all the way to 70th. These were where the mole people from the movie "Dark Days" lived. The place used to be abandoned but is now in use--we snagged a time lapse shot as the Amtrak passed us. Tomorrow I leave for Minneapolis--what a trip! Once I leave NYC, I'm sure I'll be able to reflect on it and give you guys some super awesome insight.

these pictures are by Ryan Hale, whose website is http://flickr.com/photos/ryanhale/sets

All your comments are really appreciated,and If I haven't gotten back to you yet I'm working on it. Hugs and Kisses, j-smoke

pictures from nyc

2008-09-23T18:03:00.000-07:00

Trash flotilla floating down the East River

The Cover of me and my friend Ryan's new Indie Rock Album

Me and Ryan and his Housemate Peter in their bitchin' china town apartment

Stage at this crazy cooperative house

Sign at goofy cooperative house

Graffiti building called 5 points. visit 5ptz.com for more info

Yours truly in the right corner, praising the What Cheer Brigade

Chinatown at night

No docking? Denied!

After biking around for a few hours in Chinatown and the Financial District, I went to Carnegie's Deli at 3:00 AM and had the excellent sandwich.

Mural on the Williamsburg bridge

Accidentally naked, and other delights.

2008-09-22T06:32:00.000-07:00

The day started out innocently enough. I woke up at the crack of noon, and went to the store to purchase to cook breakfast for my friends Damian, Nif, and Ned, who I am staying with in Brooklyn. A queue was forming at the local mart, whereupon I waited in line with aforementioned object. The man in front of me made note that he was "not doin' shit til monday!" as he purchased a half a bakers dozen minus one half tall boys of King Cobra. Finally, I was able to prostrate myself in front of the cashier and, after haggling for 5 hours, completed the deal.

Returning triumphantly with my purchase, I made breakfast with my captors. After a leisurely munch, we dressed ourselfs (as previously we had been naked) so as to appear at the , which was a "celebration of 51 years of German American friendship."

The four of us made forward momentum on our bikes, in light of this goal, through the madness that is Manhattan. Nif had once been in New York, and thus our trip was extremely aggressive. As Damian puts it, biking in Manhattan is akin to river rafting--you experience rapids as cars come rushing past you, then when the stream of traffic is cut off by a red light, the salubrious calm. The ride was one moment manic, hectic, and altogether batshit insane, the next moment quiet, airy, empty, and idyllic. Three seconds after crossing the Manhattan bridge, we arrived at Central Park.

We made our way to the party and weren't stoked to find out that we had to wait in line and pay $10 to get in. We were stoked when we found out that we could walk ten feet to the right of the line and walk in for free. Once inside the Stueben Parade, we weren't gruntled to find that beer was really expensive. We soon became gruntle-muffins whence we discovered that no one finished their pitchers, sauerkraut or bratwurst, and rather left them out for us to consumate. Unenthused by a brass bland playing "no woman no cry," we were nonetheless deriving pleasure when they covered "basketcase" by Green Day. Wunderbar!

When finally at long last we all of us had had our own full fill, we left to check out a Doug Aitken art show that Nif's friend helped put together. Here, they were giving the beer away! It was a video installation of different animals (including Albino Peacocks, buffalo, and bearcats) hanging out in motel rooms. Pretty .

After the gallery, Damian and made route to an xbxrx show. On the way we attempted entry into a swanky event which required having a name on the list. As it turned out, Jordan Stern (plus one) was not on the list, and neither was guard dog, which I was donning. Anyhoo, a few months ago we finally got to the show, which turned out to be not an xbxrx show, but a QxBxRx Party! (Queers, Beers and Rears, the x's being periods). Nonetheless, some good raucus punk bands were playing, and in good form the leg of my glass got snapped in the first few minutes (fear not, they will be fixed, in the meantime, my prescription face shield should suffice.)

As the show got out, Damian met a pal of his, and she informed us of a basement party in Brooklyn that sounded promising. Damian found some meatball sandwiches, but we opted not to take them (foreshadowing here). We arrived at the party, walked into a room covered with flourescent paint and filled with half, almost, and definetely naked young men. We passed the clothing check station, the body painting station, and the bathroom line to get some free beer. We sought out the back room, where people seemed to be mingling and talking in small circles, as they would at any party. Damian I mingled amongst the minglers, engaging in talk and musing on the arts, letters, and politics of the day, as we would at any party. Besides to the two middle aged men
on the chair next to us, it was pretty predictable and whatever. Damian got his nipples painted flourescent pink (surprise for Nif) we retired for the evening.

A typical day in New York.

What have I been up to?

2008-09-16T17:58:00.000-07:00

The big question thats on everyone's minds...what have I been up to?

Saturday I kicked it with my new friend Patrick, who is a performer and is also very awesome. We explored around brooklyn and wheatpasted this sweet print he found.

Later, we went to a really crazy circus show called Absinth that was super cabaret-esque with an awesome trapeze act and really muscular young men doing acrobatics in tighty-whiteys. The host and hostess (husband and wife) did a sweet little act where they spit banana bites in and out of each others mouths, culminating in the wife balancing over hubbie and spitting out a a huge lump of banana into his mouth. It really looked like graphic shitting.

Sunday I took a huge bike ride out to Canarsie pier, which isn't a super exciting place, but getting out there was fun. We rode from basically north Brooklyn, which looks kinda like downtown Oakland but with really tall housing project towers, to the idyllic prospect park, through standalone houses that looked straight outta the 50's. In New York!

Tonight I am going to cruise Chinatown and take pictures of all the 99 cent stores, maybe climb up on a rooftop or two. Hopefully tomorrow I can update ya'll with some photos.

loves,
-j

Cheap dumplings galore!

2008-09-12T11:51:00.000-07:00

For a city more expensive than San Francisco, New York certainly has a lot to offer regarding cheap food:

Dumpling Houses in Chinatown: Almost any dumpling house in Chinatown here has an 8 dumplings for 2 dollars offer, or something similar. Last night I had 8 veggie dumplings, 6 fried barbequed pork buns, and 1 sesame veggie pancake for dinner. All to the tune of $7.
Punjabi Punjabi Cab Spot: This 24/7 powerhouse is where all the indian cabbies go in NYC. Located on 1st and Houston across the street from Yonah Schimmels Knishery, you can get a big plate of rice with three veggie dishes topping it for 5 bucks. The place is very very tiny, and the best part is the strict adherence to the health code: prepared food sits in huge metal trays in a deli display case, when you pick what you want they put it on a styrofoam plate and microwave it for a few minutes.
Indian Row: Four Indian Restaurants located near Cooper Union of fourth street. They are all part of one Brownstone--two restaurants on ground level, two above them. All have very similar menus and prices. When you wait outside, one by one maitre'd's come out, until four indian dudes are all talking to you at the same time, explaining why their restuarant is the most delicious. We made our decision when one dude offered us free soup, naan, bannana fritters, rice, and ice cream. The lunch special is big and comes with samosas.

Exuding high levels of coolth, and feeling very gruntled,

-jorbaxstern

Upfart: New York Kicks Ass!

2008-09-08T06:37:00.001-07:00

Upfart is the new word for update, and so, appropriately, I will now fart-up the interesting specs from my last week and a half in New York.

I got in to town on Saturday August 30th and within 1 hour I called it, game over, mercyball: New York is next level ultimate. This city is one some other-type amazing shit. The level of activity is intense, but outside of Manhatten it actually can be kinda quiet and mellow, dare I say relaxing? I can't really describe why I like New York so much, so let me show by example, by documenting some sweet events of my splendorquest:

Seeing an exhibit at the Whitney about Buckminster Fuller and his life's work. My dad and I saw the last remaining Dymaxion Car as well as sketches of his plans to build bubble cities (see the picture on the right) that could float in mid-air! Fuller imagined these as spheres that were a half mile in diameter, and the volume of air would be so huge inside that when heated (via sunlight) the spheres would naturally rise due to pressure differentials. Whoa...
My Dad and I also found a really ritzy clothing store called San Francisco Clothing. I shouted out "Yay Area!" really loud as I opened the door but alas, it was locked! Turns out there are clothing stores in NYC that you have to get buzzed into, as in the woman at the counter needed to stare me down to make sure I was cool enough to go inside. Needless to say, I was left outside to gaze longingly at the glorious fabrics that I couldn't touch. Turns out it was all womens clothing anyway, so whatever.
I saw an art opening at a warehouse that featured the Miss Rockaway Armada (a bunch of hipsters drinking and wining about gentrification: played out and very had) and the What Cheer? brigade (a brass band that ROCKS!). There were two rooms of exhibits. One was a really nutso pile mountain of junk and stencils, drawings, and paintings all over this room that was a little smaller than a football field. The other was a tricked out lowrider bike, car, and speedboat by this artist Dvine. We danced a ton and I am definitely going to start the Magnificent Tin Can Orchestra when I get ot SF, and you're all invited to join.
Biking through Manhattan. I thought I would be prepped from biking in the Sucka Free, but this is someting else. There are no hot dog vendors running against traffic in San Francisco. There is nothing like the aggressive driving out here. And there is nothing like the blocks of bumper to bumper gridlock traffic like there is out here. It was almost too much fun, considering how dangerous it ultimately is. Don't worry, I have a helmet, in fact my friend Molly covered it with shiny stones.

Finally, I would like to share with ya'll that ultimate situations are manifesting themselves all over this trip. I day dreamed about riding a fixie in New York, and my buddy Malcolm FOUND ONE with a "FREE" sign on it. I needed to buy a helmet out here but Molly gave me hers. I keep running into people from SF, Portland, and elsewhere. I heard back from this co-op house in SF that I want to move into and they are stoked to have me step in! I found 8 dumplings for 2 dollars and the restuarant doesn't accept tips! Sarah Palin was picked as McCain's Vice Presidential running mate, just like I've been hoping for...

The point is, shit is coming together. I'm starting to believe in some of this more wierdo trippy stuff that I have typically been skeptical of and it feels good.

I'll tell you my adventures as they appear!

-J

Florida: Deep in the heart of Babylon...

2008-08-29T17:45:00.001-07:00

Holy shit Florida is DIFFERENT. I've only been here in New Smyrna Beach for two days and it is a whole different reality. Cheap strip malls, muggy weather, and filthy trailers. We can hate on how podunk Portland feels at times, but it's a megalopolis compared to this place.

Anyhoo, this new perspective makes me stoked on how much the west (best) coast has going for us. I mean, being a teenager out here, the rebellious thing to do seems to be to listen to Insane Clown Posse and have children in your 20's. Jobs are hard to come by, all the houses/malls look the same, there's nowhere to skate!

I got to meet three cousins, an uncle and a grandmother in law. My littlest cousin just turned three, and my dad decided to open a college savings account because he is totally awesome. Then he had too much birthday cake at her party and ralphed all over himself because he is totally awesome. I've got big shoes to fill...with puke.

I saw my cousin WIN a rock band competition at the Om Bar and Chill Lounge last night...it was pretty brutalepic. Actually it was four people pressed up really close against a tiny TV trying to play Rush and Metallica songs.

Tomorrow I fly to New York with pops...I hope we're not eating barf sandwiches on the plane.

-J

Welcome to the Excellent Odysee

2008-08-20T08:46:00.000-07:00

Whats up! This blog is here to document my Epic Journey to Florida, New York, Minneapolis, and Colorado as I make my way to San Francisco.

I am conceptualizing this trip as an Ultimate Wonderquest, and Excellent Odysee! I will use this blog as a space to store my thoughts and relay tales of adventure and mystery. Check in periodically to monitor my infinite reality, where space is the place, and the place is my face, and we're listening to the facemelter podcast.

What other trippy things can help describe my vacation?

My Mega-Itinerary is as follows:

Orlando: August 27th-August 30th (there is an August 30th, right?)
New York: Sept 1st-Sept 24th
Minneapolis: Sept 25th-29thish
Colorado: October 2ndish-October 20thish.
Portland: October 22ndish-November 3rd
San Francisco: November 3rd-Horizon

If you have ideas for any and everything epic, dymaxic, or facemelting that I can encounter/experience on my superior expedition, do tell.

-jordan